I took Rocky to the Secretary of State for her driver’s exam today.

Child #5 is now 16 years old, licensed, and ready to hit the road.

With Rocky’s success today, the kids are now 3 for 5 on the first try. One of the failed attempts was epic. Greta agreed to allow me to share the sad story. She was our first child to take the road test and we assumed that she would be triumphant. Instead, she returned in tears, demoralized at her failure. Apparently, while out on the road, the examiner asked her to pull over. Greta went into the maneuver a little hot and popped the curb. The examiner declared that she had failed the test and could return to try the next day.

Naturally the not-to-be-licensed driver was distressed and didn’t understand what she had done wrong. The examiner explained that popping a curb is an automatic fail on the exam. Along with things like failing to give space for an emergency vehicle, running a red light, or hitting a pedestrian. Through tears she pleaded, “But my Dad does it all the time!” The examiner would not reconsider.

Given this past event, as well as another failed first attempt, our kids were 50/50 going into today’s appointment. As we waited for the road test, I posted some pictures in the family group chat. Josephine’s responses were particularly helpful.

“Don’t turn left out of a non left turn lane👍”

“And 50 points for every pedestrian”

“And say yes when u see flashing lights in your peripheral when they do the eye test or else they will think you’re blind”

Veronica has done relatively well for a new driver. Like her siblings, she gets irritated with my prime directive: “Break early. Break often.” After her first behind-the-wheel session, her driving instructor observed that she was a little too NASCAR. He requested that she learn to steer before getting overly aggressive with the gas pedal. Honestly, I wasn’t sure what the outcome of her driving test would be. Before long she was off and returned triumphantly. Not only had she passed. She passed with a perfect score.

We celebrated with breakfast and a trip to Aldi. As we returned home, we called my folks. They were thrilled with the good news. Then my mother admitted that she had failed on her first attempt. Apparently she failed to demonstrate proper hand signals out the window during the road test. Surely there is more to the story. But Mom seems pretty certain that their family car didn’t have a turn signal.

I told Veronica to keep her hands inside the vehicle at all times.